My Marijuana Policy

Medical Marijuana is a bullshit loophole, but god bless it. It keeps us snickering. I think we should be able to have an honest Marijuana policy that gets weed to the people who need and deserve it, and keeps it away from the people who should stick to tobac and crack. The only fair way to do this is by profession. We can't discriminate on anything else really, because most people should be able to get high.

I feel like I have a right to make these policies because I am experienced. You can take LSD once and be experienced, but pot requires smoking your weight in it, and that I have accomplished Mr. Dean.

People who should be able to get high:
Doctors
Porn Stars
Cooks
Firefighters
Long-Haul Truckers
Masseuses
Clerks
Artists
Laypeople
Musicians
Judges
Comedians (duh)
Professors
Everyone who works for an airline, except Pilots
Mimes
Farmers

People who shouldn't be able to get high:
Lawyers
Drug Dealers
Servers
Policemen
Cabbies
Chiropractors
Accountants
Designers
The Unemployed (Let's motivate them!)
Auctioneers
Bailiffs
Morticians
Administrators
Pilots
Dancers
Dude Ranchers

I think it would be best for society if we just decided at 18 or 21 or whenever you put on your hat, whether you want to get high or not. Some people don't like it, there would be enough people to do the stoner jobs and enough to do the non-stoner jobs. No more faking injuries. No more overcrowded prisons. Think about it.